God please show me the way..

I have been praying that a lot lately... I am trying to decide how to make a change in life, better serve my family and do something with myself. I am leaning heavily towards returning to school. Either a technical school or a traditional college. The problem is they are to very different paths and I am still unsure which is right.
I know God has a plan, he just hasn't disclosed it to me yet.. Change is a scary thing to me. Part of me wants to stay put, be a mother, a wife and never text my boundaries. Another part of me though wants a a change, wants to be more than a mother and a wife, wants to contribute to my family financially.
I just need to find a happy medium, if there is one. I wish I knew what I am supposed to be doing. It seems just as life seems to become somewhat smooth, along comes another fork in the road and you are faced with another decision. I guess life would be boring without the little twists and turns but sometimes I wish the path was a little more straight.

My hero

I took the boys to visit their dad today at the fire station. I thought the whole time I was there about all the brave heros that gave their lives 10 years ago. It is hard not to think about that day. Hard it imagine all those father, husbands, sons lost in a senseless act of violence. Of course I also thought of all the other people who were not firemen that also died, but for me the firefighter images are the most powerful, because I am and was at the time married to a firefighter. Today as I remembered that horrible day I was also filled with pride that my husband chose to be a firefighter, to risk his life to save others.
My boys love their daddy so much and a trip to see him at work is just as good as a trip to the candy store. I love that they are proud of their daddy and his job.
I thank God today for firefighters everywhere and especially for my own special hero.

I'm still here

I have been trying to blog for days ( not that anyone reads it) but something always prevents me, mostly lack of something to say. I recovered now, getting back to regular life. My mom is gone now so I am on my own again. The kids are all in school and honestly I am still trying to get into a routine. Having two high school kids, two elementary kids and two toddlers at home is a challenge.

On top of all the daily stuff my husband and I are both considering going back to school. Our current financial status makes it necessary for a change, plus I need my husband home more! So we are prayerfully seeking our next moves.

I keep thinking life will slow down at some point but it seems to do the opposite.