Change is NOT my friend

I made it through my first few days of work. I actually LOVE the job but I don't love being away from my kids. I actually had a complete breakdown after day 1, a whole crying, praying for God to help me, lay on the floor in the closet breakdown, yeah...It just all boils down to the fact that I just don't like change. This is a good change, good for me, good for my family, yet I still am struggling. Mind you this is only a part time job, but to me it feels like my world is in an upheaval. This is the perfect job for me, a job I can't get again, I know I will enjoy it but part of me is resisting change, telling me I am a bad mother for choosing to leave my babies, even part of the time. It is crazy, I know. I know I cannot let fear keep me from doing the things I need and want to do, and so I am going to keep moving forward, baby steps...